Daily Brain Drain

Oh Yeah... An Update might be Nice

2011-09-22T17:52:00.001-07:00

So, by the way... here's where I stand in my life right now:

I met a woman on a social networking site in late January 2011, and began talking to her. She asked me out on a date, and I accepted. We met face to face for the first time on February 3rd. She treated me to dinner and delightful company. I was pretty smitten with her from the get-go :) We had a few more dates, and before I knew it, I was completely swept off my feet. For Valentine's Day, she gifted me with flowers and chocolate-covered strawberries. Good Girl!!

Before I knew it, I had totally fallen in love with her, and she with me. She moved in with me when her then-current living situation was turned upside down. It was soon and sudden, but it all worked out. We've been together ever since and life is sweeter every day. She is so kind to me, so loving, and so generous. I have found my inner peace with her. I feel like I am "home".

Ironically, we have moved twice in the very short time since she has been living with me. LOL. We're in a great house now that includes her 17-year-old son and 23-year-old daughter. It's a hectic household, and far different than what I'm used to, but I find that I love it more and more every day. I have my little family now. And even though it's not quite how I imagined I would procure it, it is my family nonetheless.

Other than the usual financial struggles (my girlfriend was laid off a few months ago & hasn't been able to find work), life is good. :)

Long Time No Post

2011-09-22T17:45:00.001-07:00

I am going crazy. I am.

I just wanted to document it so that if I flip my lid and do something insane... well, you've been warned.

Ugh. :(

Saturday's Eats

2010-03-06T17:07:00.000-08:00

For breakfast this morning, I had sleep. LOL

I slept til 10:30 or so and decided that since I was closer to lunch, I would just hold off until then. I had to run some payday errands before heading into work for a little while. So before I went to work, I picked up a double cheeseburger & small fries from Burger King. I know that's not healthy, but I did skip my breakfast calorie allotment, and I did choose SMALL fries. LOL

Haven't eaten dinner yet tonight, and trying to decide what I'm going to get. I will have to buy out somewhere... no groceries yet. More than likely will hit up Subway for a Subway Club, toasted, on Italian Herbs & Cheese bread, with a bowl of golden broccoli soup. Mmmmmmmmm yum!!

Where did the time go???

2010-03-06T16:59:00.000-08:00

Sorry about that. Got sidetracked by exhaustion & have put off posting. Doesn't mean I have been cheating. I just haven't been posting. I will recall as much as I can for you, though. No pictures. Too lazy to find & hook up the camera right now.

Wednesday breakfast - dry cereal & 2 hard-boiled eggs
Wednesday lunch - took a co-worker out for a bon voyage celebration. Her last day was this week. We went to Cracker Barrel & I had the hamburger steak with broccoli casserole & mashed potatoes.
Wednesday dinner - I honestly can't remember, though I know it included salad.

Thursday breakfast - apple
Thursday lunch - nothing. I was so tired at work that I couldn't keep my eyes open, so I left at 10am and came home. Laid down to sleep it off & I didn't wake up until 7pm!!
Thursday dinner - salmon, steamed green beans

Friday breakfast - chicken biscuit
Friday lunch - taco bell has new shrimp tacos, so i tried a couple of those
Friday dinner - salad and chicken wings

Which brings us to today. Which I will post on it's own separate entry.

Not as great, but still Good

2010-03-02T19:50:00.000-08:00

I did not do as well today, but I'm still making better choices. This is a marathon, not a sprint.

I had the first appointment slot at the dentist's office this morning, so I couldn't eat before leaving the house. So on the way to work after having my teeth cleaned, I stopped at Hardee's and got a sausage biscuit for breakfast. This is a VAST improvement over my usual selection of TWO sausage, egg, and cheese biscuits.

For lunch, I took a can of soup to work with me. Chicken & Wild Rice with about 2/3 of a sleeve of saltines. (I like a little bit of soup with my crackers.)

Snack time came in the form of some truly delicious Roasted Garlic crackers from Kashi. They sort have a shredded wheat texture, so they're very satisfyingly crunchy & hearty without weighing you down. Those with 2 oz of Colby cheese really hit the spot.

Dinner was a special treat tonight. When I made my plans to go on this journey, I decided to allow myself one 'splurge' dinner each week so I didn't feel like I was 'giving up the good stuff'. So tonight's New York Strip & baked potato & salad was delicious. I made the salad my largest portion of the meal. Put two hard-boiled eggs on it, along with some low-fat shredded cheese, and some salad topper stuff that included sesame crunches & sunflower seeds. Because the salad filled me up so much, I shared part of the steak with my dog (lucky, lucky Pico!!!) and only ate half of the potato.

So, again... not a super great day, but still miles better than my usual fare. Which means that I am still improving. And it's only Day #2, so I can only go up from here! :)

I'm Back... With a Mission!

2010-03-01T18:42:00.000-08:00

I have made myself a lofty goal. I will lose 215 pounds by my 35th birthday. This sounds astronomical, but it boils down to only 2-3 pounds per week from now til then. Which is Totally reasonable in my mind. Because I've been dealing with some fairly serious lung issues, I have to focus my energy on consuming less calories as opposed to exercising more. Unfortunately, my lungs are in such poor shape that they just can't handle a lot of strenuous activity. I'm likely to pass out if I get too winded.

Anyway... Today was a pretty good day by MY usual standards. This may not sound like a really great diet day to other people, but you have to take into consideration what a totally crappy eating plan I was following before.

For breakfast, I ate a 1.6oz package of Kashi cereal. No milk. Just the cereal. It lasted a lot longer that way, so I didn't feel like I gulped down my breakfast & was ready for something else.

For lunch, I picked up a soup & salad combo from Cracker Barrel. I got the Country Chef Salad with Ranch dressing and a cup of vegetable beef soup with four crackers. This meal was surprisingly filling & delicious too. I love a good salad. I just don't love all the prep work that goes into making one myself. Being able to buy for a reasonable price is awesome.

After work, I went to the grocery store to pick up meal ingredients for the rest of the week. Since there is a Subway store inside Wal-Mart, I got soup & a sandwich for dinner. I forgot to take a pic though :( So I'm going to borrow from the Subway site. LOL

So. Under 2750 calories today, which is EXCELLENT compared to my usual intake. And I got in some walking today - just around the grocery store. But if you've ever seen me grocery shop, I am on a mission when I go in. I am Not a browser. So I move my tookus when I'm in there. Plus, I parked about half-way down a row so I would have to walk extra.

Whew. Good day! I'm proud of myself. And I'm not hungry. THAT is the biggest victory :)

Today's RAOK

2010-01-05T18:22:00.000-08:00

Today's Random Act of Kindness was me speaking very cheerfully & politely to my former next-door neighbor. She's as sweet as she can be, and very very kind. But she is elderly, and like many other persons of her particular generation, she deems me as far beneath her solely because of my age. It's not the words she says. It's not the tone she uses. It's just the air about her and her body language. I feel like she expects me to feel grateful for the opportunity to learn from her wisdom. And honestly.... she is a SUPER nice lady. But I am somewhat solitary in my living preferences, so I don't necessarily appreciate the uninvited conversation of my neighbors. You leave me in peace, I leave you in peace. I know that's not exactly "nice" of me. But it is what it is.

Anyway - when she came over today as I was hurriedly moving boxes and furniture into my car and the bed of a co-worker's truck, I was VERY polite to her. And I talked to her with a smile on my face. And I said "Thank you" to her as she left.

Yes, I do agree with you, that this is simply commonplace good manners. And this is how I should treat ALL of my conversational partners. However, if you know me at all, you know that talking to me while I am in the middle of strenuous physical activity is NOT the time to expect me to be Susie Sunshine.

And therefore, I declare my display of extreme good manners to be a wonderful Act of Kindness.

i hate moving

2010-01-02T16:56:00.000-08:00

I hate moving so much. It's such a pain the rear. And doing it all by yourself makes it a thousand times worse. I have had some help in moving the big furniture items. But I mean, as a single person, it sucks to have the entire burden on my shoulders. The only reason I had to move was because my landlord/property owner let the duplex I was renting go into foreclosure. She's had an incredibly tough year, so I'm not angry with her for falling victim to her circumstances. What pisses me off is that I continued to pay my rent every month, and she didn't even have the decency to let me know there were any kind of issues. The only reason I found out is because the attorney's notice of foreclosure auction got addressed to "Tenant" & the mailman placed the envelope in my mailbox. Needless to say, I was freaked out when I read it. I immediately called my landlord (who did not answer her phone) looking for answers. She had none for me. Great.

A month later, I attend the "auction" in the hopes of pleading with the new owner to let me stay as a tenant - guaranteed income, right? I even went to the trouble of making up a nice little one-page bio sheet about myself that included my picture, employment history, salary info, and character references. All for naught. Because I was the ONLY person who showed up. So the duplex went to the bank. And the bank told me to get out.

Luckily, the local Realtor who was contracted to handle the eviction & subsequent listing of the property has been extraordinarily kind to me. My official deadline to be out of the old place is January 11th, which is swiftly approaching. I am trying my best to hurry up and get everything out, but I am in poor physical condition to say the very least, and I just can't do much at one time. It's been difficult.

Anyway. My new year has started in a new dwelling, and I am praying that that is a good omen for things to come... a fresh start, a new day, a second chance.

RAOK of the day: I yielded to a harried-looking driver trying to turn left onto the busy highway that I was driving down. He waved and seemed very appreciative. Day 2 of Resolution a success!

2010 Resolution

2010-01-01T19:34:00.000-08:00

In 2010, I resolve to perform one act of random kindness every day. Surely, I can manage to keep up with that. And in the end, I will feel like I have contributed to the world in a meaningful way. Maybe some good karma will find it's way back into my life one day. In the meantime, I want to take all focus off of myself and instead put my energy to use for others. That's what makes me happiest. Being of service to others truly fulfills me. Here's to 2010!!

Today's random act of kindness (henceforth RAOK):

I took my neighbor's newspapers out of the box and placed them on his front step. I think he's out of town this week, and his paper box was full. Didn't want the paper delivery person to keep stuffing them in there to the point that they would hang out & get wet if it rained.

Name The Person Questions Survey

2009-09-05T20:11:00.000-07:00

Who was your first kiss?
Kevin Barnes

Who was your first crush?
David Dillow

Who makes you happy?
Pico (my dog)

First BF/GF?
Walter Kirby

First Date?
Michael Sluss

First Prom?
Mine - date was Kevin Barnes

First Fight?
never been in a fight

Your mentor in life?
Mom & Dad

The first person to get youo into trouble?
my brother - ALWAYS!

Who do you want to be with right now?
someone who loves me

Who did you think of first today?
Mom

Who makes you laugh? 2 people
Linda & Sheila

Who do you at the moment want to slap?
i plead the 5th

Favorite Actor?
Gerard Butler

Favorite teacher in High school?
Ms. Petty

Who texts you the most?
Trista Barrett

Favorite relative other then parents, brothers,sisters, or children?
Jay Daunoy

First name of children if you have any?
none

First person that comes to mind when you hear the word Love?
no one. God, that makes me so sad :(

Random Survey For The Bored

2009-08-22T15:17:00.001-07:00

What is on your desktop wallpaper?
a picture i took at Brookgreen Gardens

What is your favorite zoo animal?
elephant

What was your favorite toy as a child?
my brother. LOL

What food do you eat too much of?
fast food in all its glorious forms

What kind of hairstyle do you have?
long layers

What was your favorite activity in gym class?
weight lifting

What is on the shirt you are wearing right now?
a big Venezia Jeans logo

What is the picture nearest to you of?
me & Joel Mantooth at Teen Board 1992

What kind of salad dressing do you like?
ranch

Whats your least favorite food?
peppers

What do you do on a Sunday night?
watch True Blood and Hung

If you could only use one condiment on your food for the rest of your life, what would it be?
ranch dressing

What color are your sheets?
pink & maroon stripes

How big is your computer display?
15"

What pair of shoes do you wear most often?
my American Eagle striped sneakers

What is your favorite game?
mah jongg

What is your favorite Thanksgiving food?
stuffing

What is your favorite pizza topping?
pepperoni

What time do you plan on waking up tomorrow?
no plans

What is your favorite day of the year?
my birthday

Three Things survey

2009-08-16T20:39:00.000-07:00

3 out door activities that you enjoy?
swimming; driving; hiking

3 things you look for in the opposite sex?
humor; honesty; manners

3 places you would like to visit ?
NYC; Ireland; Germany

3 things you like on your sandwich ?
bacon; cheese; mustard

3 habits / or vices you have?
diet soda; television; food

3 of your favorite people ?
Makenzie; Riley; Trista

3 of your favorite foods ?
pizza; chicken; salmon

3 of your favorite holidays ?
halloween; thanksgiving; birthday

3 sport teams ?
UT Vols; SCHS Bears; PFMS Tigers

3 favorite movies ?
Love Actually; The Goonies; Fox and the Hound

3 favorite smells ?
vanilla; pumpkin spice; citrus

3 things you like to do on a date ?
eat; talk; kiss

3 TV shows that you watch the most ?
True Blood; Ellen Degeneres; Ghost Hunters

3 favorite things to do ?
listen to music; drive; sing

3 people you miss ?
Scotty; Dad; Mom

3 things that scare you ?
falling; dying alone; anesthesia

3 things that make you laugh ?
babies; dogs; Jo Koy

Trying to get back in the swing of things

2009-08-14T10:02:00.000-07:00

Using only song names from ONE ARTIST, cleverly answer these questions. Pass it on to 15 people you like (or think will actually do this) and include me. Try not to repeat a song title. It's harder than you think but it's a fun way to waste a few minutes and get the brain cells moving around.

Your Artist: Elvis Presley

Are you male or female: Hard Headed Woman

Describe yourself: Only the Strong Survive

How do you feel about yourself: Sentimental Me

Describe where you currently live: In The Ghetto

If you could go anywhere, where would you go: Viva Las Vegas

Your favorite form of transportation: Long, Lonely Highway

Your best friend: Mama

Your dream boy/girl: Love Me Tender

Your life motto: A Little Less Conversation

If your life were a TV show, what would it be called: T-R-O-U-B-L-E

What is life to you: Big Love, Big Heartache

What is the best advice you have to give: Stop, Look and Listen

If you could change your name, what would you change it to?: C.C. Rider

Your favorite food is: New Orleans

How I would like to die: A Hundred Years From Now

My soul's present condition: Mystery Train

So Ashamed

2009-07-05T16:21:00.000-07:00

For the most part, as much I dislike living in Cocke County, I do have to say that the majority of the people that are native here are good, hard-working, respectful people. But there are times like today that remind me of why I so desperately do *NOT* want to be associated with Cocke County in any way.

I go to Sonic today around 3pm to get some late lunch. There is a car parked on either side of me. From the car to my right emerges a woman with the following medical accoutrement: purple nitrile gloves (why???), circulation support stockings, a neck brace, and a walking cane. Your instant reaction might be to pity her, yes? Not once you realize that the reason she has gotten out of the car is to stand at the trash can/cigarette receptacle to chain smoke 3 cigs back-to-back while her elderly mother (who is driving) orders and waits for the food to arrive. So...... let's review. She's wearing a neckbrace, has to use a cane to support herself, has on support hose that are squeezing the life out of her legs, and all she is concerned about is smoking a damn cigarette. No, wait, THREE cigarettes. In a span of maybe 10 minutes. I guess it wouldn't have made such an impact on me if it weren't for the crazy purple gloves. WHY did she have those on?? I cannot for the life of me figure that one out.

On the third lighting of the cigarette, her elderly mother sticks her head out of the car, yelling her name, in what I assume is an effort to tell her to stop it and get her ass back in the car. But she pays her no mind whatsoever, so lost is she in her nicotine frenzy. I'm telling you the look on her face was just plain creepy. She was enjoying those cigarettes *WAY* too much. Yuck. Behold:

Duckies!!

2009-06-25T17:09:00.000-07:00

My brother works as a maintenance tech at an apartment complex in Myrtle Beach. One of his jobs is to maintain the pool. There are a few resident ducks at the apartments, and one of them had laid a nest. My brother didn't want the eggs hatching and the new ducks thinking that the pool was an acceptible habitat. LOL

So he took the nest home (if he just moved it, I don't think mama duck would have found it, and all would have died) and set up a heat lamp to hatch the ducklings. Out of several eggs (8, I think?), he is now the proud papa of two cute little fuzzy ducks. They are ADORABLE!! Once they're big enough that a hawk won't mistake them for a snack, I think he's going to release them to the pond that is behind his house. Pretty cool :)

B U S Y

2009-06-24T19:32:00.000-07:00

Have mercy!! When will work slow down??!! And I have to travel next month. Ugh. I will miss my dog soooooo much :(

Family reunion this weekend, and I am very excited!! It's been too long since I was able to go :)

Pico takes centerstage

2009-06-21T09:50:00.001-07:00

I decided to start a new photo blog of Pico. I will post a picture each day to document his little doggie life :)

Hope to see you all there :)

picopuppy.blogspot.com

thunderstorms

2009-06-17T19:40:00.000-07:00

***BIG*** thunderstorm rolled thru tonight. Pico was Not impressed. I loved it, but did get concerned that there might, indeed, be a tornado about to happen as bad as it got. Thank goodness all is ok. Power spazzed a couple of times, but dinner still turned out ok, so no problems.

Making brownies tonight to take to work tomorrow. Thought it would be a nice treat for us. New kind that has a brownie layer with choc chip cookie dough dropped on top. Hope they turn out okay. Sure do smell good.....

I am disappointed that no one is using my cute little voting buttons at the bottom of my posts. :(

just checking in...

2009-06-15T19:54:00.000-07:00

Pretty focused day at work today. Still had to bring stuff home, though. Worked an hour & a half while listening to Pico devour his new gnawing bone. I went grocery shopping after work, and saw a chewy/gnawing bone for him whose primary ingredient was *NOT* rawhide, so I snatched it up. He loved it, and very affectionately licked it after each bite. It was as if he was saying "I know I'm chomping on you, but you're delicious, and I'm so sorry if it hurts". LOL

Got a new logo shirt and jacket from work today. Evidently, everyone else got theirs on the day I took off to go visit my Dad. The shirt has our new corporate logo, and the jacket is a VERY nice windbreaker style with a hidden rain hood and mesh lining on the inside. It's from Land's End. Shirt is my FAV color - bright Tennessee orange. Love it!! Jacket is bright red and very lightweight. Was nice to get something special for a change instead of just more assignments and gloomy news.

Family reunion not this weekend, but next. Looking forward to that. Good food, good jokes, good hugs, good times =) And you can never go wrong eating some fresh, hot North Carolina BBQ! w00t!!

WHEW!!!

2009-06-14T17:48:00.000-07:00

So I know it's been a long time since I posted. I have been very busy, and thus very tired, and therefore very unmotivated :)

I've survived year-end at work. w00t.

I've gone home for a surprise visit to the family. Dad was the intended surprisee. I showed up at the restaurant he was having lunch at Friday afternoon and I believe the man had tears in his eyes. Awwwwwwwwwwww :) My Daddy still loves me. LOL

Pico and I have been enjoying the drier weather now that Noah has decided to park the Ark.

Pico had his first vet visit last week - very good boy didn't act scared at all. In fact he seemed excited to meet all the new people. He was VERY upset with me when I did not allow him to play with the other dogs in the lobby. I tried in vain to keep him out of the laps of the women seated on either side of me, but that was difficult considering I was trying to fill out his new patient paperwork at the same time.

Other than that, we've just been bumming around... hanging out on the couch and watching tv

LOL - that's my crazy burrito dog - always snuggled up in something. Too funny =)

exhausted

2009-05-30T17:27:00.000-07:00

I have no right to complain. The other girls in the office have had to put in a *LOT* more time than me. But I am absolutely exhaused. When I left work today (at 7pm), I had already racked up 19 hours of OT in the past two weeks. And I have to work again tomorrow.

Have I mentioned yet how much year-end sucks when you work in the Finance department of a major food manufacturing facility?

Paycheck will be good, but morale is way way down. Heaven help me.

tired

2009-05-27T17:55:00.000-07:00

i know i haven't posted in a few days... i have been SO tired. this week is the last week of our fiscal year at work, and i am busting my hump trying to clean up all old invoices, etc so that i have a clean cut-off. i don't realize how intensely i am focusing until i get home after work and realize just how tense my body feels and how exhausted i am. thank goodness there's only 2 (maybe 3) days left of this intensity level. next week will be demanding, also, with final reports and validations and stuff. but at least i can breathe easier once June 1st appears on my calendar.

thinking of maybe taking a very special roadtrip next weekend to celebrate. if i can pull together the funds, i am definitely doing it!

ugh

2009-05-24T14:40:00.000-07:00

why can i never follow through on anything i say i'm going to do?

all the cleaning i have done consists of 3 sinkfuls of dishes and 2 loads of laundry

i am useless

does it make me racist?

2009-05-22T20:14:00.000-07:00

I don't think it does, but.... I'm not entirely sure that my feelings toward non-American residents in this country aren't racist in some way. Let me explain:

I feel that if I were to move to a foreign country, let's say... SWEDEN... it would be appropriate of me to try to have at least a basic knowledge of common phrases and conversational items in SWEDISH. Since it is their language, and I did choose to live there. That's a reasonable expectation, I think. Furthermore, I would feel somewhat obliged to become familiar with their culture & customs so that I could better understand my new neighbors, yes? This would be a respectful way of honoring the citizens of Sweden who are being so kind and welcoming to me, a new citizen. Are we all in agreement so far?

I swear to you that I am NOT talking about the Hispanic or Latino community. The people that are pissing me off in a major way are the idiots who contact me on yahoo messenger using VERY broken English, asking completely inappropriate questions, and suggesting that because I am merely female I must certainly need their attention, as I could not possibly be fulfilled without a man to "take care your needs". UGH!!!

To all you men of Middle Eastern, Indian, and Egyptian descent: I am an American Woman. This means I am independent. I can take care of myself. I don't need a MAN to help me survive each day that I wake. Just because I am single/fat/over 30/etc, does NOT mean that I am desperately craving your conversation.

It drives me insane to receive these condescending, half-gibberish messages from men who think that I need to be rescued from the world. So does that make me racist?

clean clean clean

2009-05-21T19:55:00.000-07:00

I desperately need to clean my house. That's what I plan to do with my weekend. I'm going to purge and pack and store and scrub. Doesn't that sound like loads of fun?

Seriously though, I think that finally removing every last bit of EJ's stuff out of this house will help me to move forward. Monday will mark one year since we split up, and I still have days where I feel like nothing is right with me anymore. If I can clean this place up and feel like I have accomplished something, I think I can allow myself to move towards the future. It's not like I sit around thinking that one day EJ and will magically fall back in love. HA!!! But I do have days when it's harder than others to cope with the pain and the loss that I still feel. Ten years is a LONG time to share every aspect of your life with someone. It doesn't all just disappear overnight.

So if anyone is bored and wants to come help me purge & scrub, I'd be thrilled to get the help. LOL..... like anyone would really volunteer. Ha.

need a haircut

2009-05-20T21:00:00.000-07:00

My hair is getting really long. It's almost as long as it was in high school. When I tilt my head back, the bottom of my hair just touches the small of my back. I got a shag haircut last fall, and loved it at first, but I'm trying to let the layers grow out enough now so that when I do go get it cut to one length, I'll still have plenty of length left. Know what I mean? I know the ladies know exactly what I'm talking about.

Anyway. Nothing very exciting going on with me. Work is ramping up for our fiscal year-end and I stay busy. I'm keeping my fingers crossed that I can resolve all of my outstanding invoices so that my final balance sheet validation is crystal clear. If any of you know what that means, welcome to my hell. LOL

2009-05-18T20:36:00.000-07:00

Very productive at work today. Got a lot accomplished. Yay for me! :)

Went grocery shopping tonight... always hate that. But I signed up for that couponsuzy.com website that you see advertised on tv sometimes, and every now & then, you really do get GOOD coupons. I got a box of Kraft Deluxe Shells & Cheese for $1 after the coupon I printed from couponsuzy. The DELUXE box, y'all. Not the grody powder cheese, but the good stuff. Recently, I've gotten a lot of good coupons for cereal and Kashi products, which I love. I recommend the site. There is, of course, a lot of fluff crap that nobody on the planet cares about, but the good coupons are there at least once or twice a month. I typically save about $10 - $20 each month with the coupons I print from that site. It's worth downloading the free program, I think.

For those of you with smaller children, I've seen a lot of diaper and children's product coupons lately. I've been signed up since this past fall, and the coupons rotate in and out. And you get an e-mail when new coupons have been added. If you decide to try it & just hate it, I'm very sorry. But I honestly do think it's worth your time to at least check it out.

2009-05-17T19:04:00.000-07:00

How stinking adorable are my niece & nephew? I miss them so much :(

ABC's of Me

2009-05-16T15:25:00.000-07:00

A - Age: 32

B - Bed size: King

C - Chore you hate: washing dishes

D - Dogs or cats: Dogs

E - Essential start your day item: music

F - Favorite color: orange

G - Gold or Silver: Silver

H - Height: 5'6"

I - Instruments you played: piano & trumpet

J - Job title: Finance Specialist II

K - Kid(s): none :(

L - Loud or quiet: depends on my mood

M - Mom's name: Donna

N - Nicknames: Turtle, Penstance, JC, Pennz

O - Overnight hospital stay: none (knock on wood)

P - Pet Peeve: tardiness & people who talk in movies

Q - Favorite quote from a movie: "I'm just a girl, standing in front of a boy, asking him to love her."

R - Right or left handed: Right

S - Siblings: younger brother Scott

T - Time you wake up: shortly after 7am

U- Underwear: is chosen according to the occasion

V - Vegetable you dislike: turnips

W - Ways you run late: getting food - stupid drive-thru lanes

X - X-rays you've had: lower GI, teeth

Y - Yummy food you make: i'm a pretty good cook, but Thanksgiving is the day I truly shine :)

Z - Zoo favorite: elephant

yay weekend!

2009-05-15T20:29:00.000-07:00

I am SO glad the weekend is finally here. This week was HELL at work. One of the people I work with in the Corporate office was out on vacation this week, and the girl who covered her job was AWFUL. There was lots of stuff messed up with my payroll, and I was beyond frustrated Monday afternoon. I will be so very glad that my regular person is back come Monday :)

There's been so much negative energy at work lately because of the implementation of a new operating system this month. All that kvetching for the past few weeks has just smashed my morale into oblivion. I've tried very hard to remain positive and to block out the complaining and griping, but it's really hard to do that...... and then I had an a-ha moment....

That must be exactly what my co-workers feel like when *I* am kvetching, complaining, and griping about something that has gone wrong for me... like a bad payroll run :(

So, even though I know it will be difficult some days, my pledge to myself for the next six months is to count to 5 before I complain about anything at work. If I take the time to stop my mouth from running before I have even finished processing my negative thoughts, I will be a more productive employee and a more pleasant co-worker with which to share office space. Hopefully. I don't know.... all this happy-happy stuff annoys even me sometimes. LOL

But the ONLY thing I can control is my reaction to things around me. If I pledge to refrain from my negative reactions, maybe I will be better equipped to let others' negative reactions roll right off my back like water off a duck's butt :)

I'm tired. Time to stop rambling now. LOL

voting buttons

2009-05-14T19:30:00.000-07:00

by the way, i got bored and put feedback buttons on my posts. now you can let me know what you think of my posts without the hassle of actually having to type words in the comment page. you can just clickety-click your mouse and VOILA!

yeah, i know... but i'm bored and lonely. what else do you expect from me?

narcoleptic

2009-05-14T19:25:00.000-07:00

I think maybe I have become narcoleptic. I cannot seem to stay awake at work during the day. I even came home on my lunch hour today & took a nap, hoping that would help. Not so much. And then, once I got home from work, I sat down on the couch to watch some of my DVR'ed stuff and fell asleep again.

I fear I am going to HAVE to get my big fat butt in gear and lose this weight, as well as see the sleep specialist. ENT doc told me it was almost certain I had sleep apnea, but I haven't gone to get the sleep study because they're so expensive & it's a massive ordeal to get it approved for insurance.

But if I'm sleeping so poorly that I'm zonking out at work, and then again when I get home, obviously I have to do something.

Sucks. Oh well. At least I'm still alive, right? Can't really complain too much... alive, roof over head, food in fridge, gainful employment.... yeah, I'm pretty damn good overall :)

Fun Times

2009-05-13T21:05:00.000-07:00

So, after work, I went and got my tan on for a few minutes, and then EJ and I drove to Knoxville to meet our mutual friend Trae for dinner at a new Indian restaurant and to see Star Trek in Imax.

I had never eaten Indian food before - all I knew was that curry is a predominant spice in Indian cuisine, and I don't like curry. I wound up ordering something called Lamb Rogan Josh that was REALLY good. Just a simple lamb stew served over rice. We got some garlic naan to go with it (a flat bread). I was very pleasantly surprised. Good stuff, and I will go back again. Trae - who is the pickiest eater on the planet - got Mango Lamb, and EJ got Mango Chicken. I'm not a big fan of mangoes, so I didn't try theirs, but it all smelled wonderful.

After dinner we went to see the new Star Trek movie in Imax. I am in no way, shape, or form, a Star Trek fan. But the trailers have looked intriguing for this film, and everyone who has seen it has given positive reviews regardless of their placement on the "Trekkie" continuum of fan devotion.

It
Was
AWESOME
!!!!!!!!!!!

GREAT action, GREAT humor, GREAT character development, GREAT dialogue. I loved it. In fact, I loved it so much, that if they decide to pursue another film with this cast, I will DEFintely go see it. The casting was just Brilliant. I loved every minute from start to finish. All this raving praise from a person who would rather turn off the television and scrub toilets than watch a single episode of the original television series.

I think that speaks for itself.

You MUST go see it!

funny pic

2009-05-12T21:25:00.000-07:00

Thought I'd give you guys something to laugh about. I have a tendency to behave like a lunatic in front of a camera. This is evidence of my psychosis.

dinner - mom's casserole

2009-05-12T17:39:00.000-07:00

Tonight I am making my mom's famous broccoli chicken casserole for dinner. Doesn't sound so spectacular, but my GOD, the way this thing tastes.... Have Mercy! It's loaded with so much butter and mayonnaise that Paula Deen would be jealous. It is most certainly NOT a body-friendly meal, but I only make it once or twice a year - if that. So I can live with the short-term consequences.

Tonight is the Top 3 in American Idol. I need to start watching. They always run over at the end, and my DVR is too inconsiderate to keep recording for me, so I need to zoom thru the commercials to get to the end before it's too late.

Ciao Bellas~

SO frustrated

2009-05-11T17:07:00.000-07:00

So back in February (I think) a friend of mine fixed my pc. He did a fantastic job. I am *sooooooo* happy with the performance of the computer. I am quite pissed, however, at MYSELF, for saving the wrong iTunes library when it was time to migrate all my files back onto the hard drive. I saved one of EJ's old folders (mostly stuff I'm just not that crazy about) instead of my own.

I can recreate my library by sitting here for days on end ripping all of my cd's again, but that is a TOTAL drag, so I'm not looking forward to it. I haven't checked it before now because honestly, I was too lazy to get my iPod plugged back in to charge. I only got it out to buy & load the new BEP song "Boom Boom Pow". When I plugged it up and went to re-sync my stuff, all of my music was gone. Vamoose. Adios. Sayanara.

At least I could recover the stuff I had purchased directly from Apple.

So for the next 2 or 3 weeks, I'll be right here ripping cd's trying to get back up to speed. Sigh.

lazy sunday

2009-05-10T19:57:00.000-07:00

pretty lazy day just bumming around the house with my buddy Pico. we've watched some tv, taken a nap (or maybe two LOL), eaten dinner, and surfed the net.

had fun yesterday despite the rain, and had a good time when i went out last night, as well. got to meet a few new people who were pretty damn fun to hang out with.

back to normal boring life tomorrow, though. ugh. planning on seeing Star Trek movie this week. and i don't even LIKE Star Trek. that's how good the trailers are for this movie!! LOL

2009-05-09T12:36:00.000-07:00

I got to be one of the judges at today's "Womanless Beauty Pageant" at the Relay for Life event. It was *SO MUCH FUN*!!!

These 'girls' rocked it hard. We had 5 contestants, and every single one of them were absolutely fabulous. The second runner-up was part Polynesian, and did an awesome Hula dance for his talent portion. I was very impressed at how well he could move those hips! LOL

First runner-up was Chi Chi, a Puerto Rican from California with outstanding hair (that was actually his own). Full of sass and sexiness, I wish the points could have worked out for her to win :(

The winner was a huge tall guy in a toga with full beard to go along with his make-up. The Ladies' Fellowship of his church convinced to be in the pageant, and I'm sure he did them proud. The best part of his schtick was the cute little poem he wrote & recited for his talent. The last line was something to the effect of... he should win this event because there was no one who was Less of woman than him. LOL

It rained REALLY hard today, so the turn-out wasn't very big for the event, but I had a LOT of fun judging the contest at least. I had some fantastic shrimp boil, too. $10 bought me a to-go container Full of huge shrimp, smoked sausage, potatoes and corn on the cob. Justin Wilson would have been proud. That was some DAMN fine shrimp boil!!!

I'm headed out tonight to have some fun. Kick up my heels and let go of some of my worries for a while. Maybe I'll track down Chi Chi and get her to do my hair...........

what a week!!

2009-05-08T21:19:00.000-07:00

It's been one HELL of a week. Very dramatic, emotional, stressful, chaotic.... I am so glad the weekend is officially here.

I was supposed to have a date tonight, but we had to postpone. But I have mostly caught up with stuff on my DVR and washed a load of laundry.

Tomorrow should be very busy for me:
-go tanning when I get up
-go by the pharmacy
-shower & get ready for Relay for Life event (volunteering in concession truck)
-come home & nap
-shower & get ready to go out to the club for some fun & relaxation
-party like a rockstar

May 9th is my ex's birthday and I've been feeling kind of sad about the whole thing. Hopefully, by keeping myself busy I'll be able to shift my focus and keep my mind off of it.

Send me lots of love vibes & good karma, people! I need it!!!

sad

2009-05-06T16:03:00.000-07:00

I am feeling overwhelmingly sad lately. There seems to be so much going on with so many of the people I love. And I feel like there's nothing I can do. Some of the crap is stuff that was caused by my actions, or at least involves my reactions. So some of it can be blamed on me. I always think of myself in a positive way... I try very hard not to be a burden or albatross to anyone. But I'm only human. And sometimes I do things that are hurtful, or I make a bad choice, or I behave poorly. But I never have bad intentions - I just screw up sometimes.

I think of myself as generous, caring, and compassionate. But the instant that I do or say something out of my normal character, people forget the good qualities that I have like they never even existed. Have people just stopped forgiving each other? Is that why it's so hard for me to cope with this pain? Do I forgive too easily and not realize that other people don't? I just don't know anymore.

I feel myself sliding into a very depressed state of mind. I'm honestly not sure where to start to get myself back on track. I think it would be beneficial for me to see a therapist, but I just don't have that kind of money. There are so many issues weighing on my mind right now with many different people in my life. It seems like there is no hope for me anymore. I guess all I can really do is just deal with one issue at a time, and continue to come here to vent and emote so that I don't keep it all bottled up inside.

I'm not looking for pity or encouragement or anything like that. I just need some understanding.

mother's day cards

2009-05-04T19:01:00.000-07:00

I think they should make Mother's Day cards for pet parents. I have no human children (which saddens me greatly), but I am the sole provider for my dog. I think that I deserve to get a nice card on Mother's Day. Caring for a dog is, in some sense, like caring for a child, right?

I mean, I feed him; bathe him; play with him; give him treats when he's been good; discipline him when he's been bad; teach him new things; provide shelter; ensure his well-being.... Don't I deserve a card?

Hell. At least give me a sticker or something. LOL

Despite the rain...

2009-05-03T19:04:00.000-07:00

Despite the rain, I had a really good day today! :)

Went to Knoxville to drop off some books that a friend had lent to me. Then got two new pairs of tennis shoes that are Awesome. Yay! I have been in desperate need of new tennies for a long time. Then went to Barnes & Noble to use a giftcard I received back at Christmas. Got a new Stephen King novel and a cool travel book. Then met my friends Misti & Lynn at Petsmart to give a dog crate to them (also lent to me by above-mentioned friend). After the exchange, I went in to Petsmart and got some fun new stuff for my beloved Pico.

When I got home, I put on my tanning accelerator/bronzer and headed over to the tanning place. Rounded out the day by going to dinner with my work buddy Linda. And despite the crappy crappy rain that seems determined to fall for all eternity, I had a great day. Too bad I have to go back to work tomorrow. UGH...

dreary day

2009-05-02T16:02:00.000-07:00

I had tentatively planned on going out tonight, but think I have decided to just make it a pizza & movie night at home. The rain makes me so sleepy, and I've been useless all day...

Poor Pico is bored to tears and I feel guilty for not being more fun. Maybe he and I will take another drive through the mountains tonight. He loves going for car rides. Would at least be a change of scenery for a couple of hours.

Pico is Deranged

2009-05-01T14:37:00.000-07:00

My dog Pico is hilarious. He has mental issues, but that's part of what makes him so funny. LOL

In the video attached here, what you can't see just beyond the door frame is a large mirror propped against the wall. Every so often (and only when Pico is bored or I'm not paying enough attention to him), he will stop and stare at himself in the mirror and start barking at "the other dog". It makes me laugh til I nearly pee my pants.

I was trying to catch him in the act, but as you will see, he stops as soon as I am paying attention to him. He is SUCH a ham.... as soon as he knows someone is watching, he's happy as can be. I guess I'm not the only actor in the family! LOL

Sorry for the grainy quality - it's from my cell phone.

air conditioning

2009-04-30T16:04:00.000-07:00

Air Conditioning got fixed today! HOORAY!!!

It was so very pleasant to walk in my house after work to freshly circulated, cooled air. I am sure that my dog (Pico) appreciates it too. He is a chihuahua, so he may not necessarily appreciate the "cool" of it, but the circulating air is VERY nice!

The ironic thing is, there's supposed to be a cold front coming thru this weekend. LOL :)

Television Addict

2009-04-29T19:59:00.000-07:00

I am addicted to television. Sad but true.

Some of my favorite shows that I watch regularly:

The Ellen Degeneres Show
Dancing With the Stars
Medium
Paranormal State
American Idol
The Biggest Loser
Ghost Hunters
Ghost Hunters International
Ugly Betty
The Office
Parks & Recreation
The Unusuals
Head Case
Dogtown
Saturday Night Live
True Blood
Big Love
The L Word
RuPaul's Drag Race
Project Runway
Top Chef
Hell's Kitchen
anything on the Food Network
Time Warp
Forensic Files
Dateline: 48 Hours
The First 48
Jon and Kate Plus Eight
City Confidential

I'm sure I'll think of others after I post this. As you can see, it's Reality TV that really sucks me in.

just thinking out loud

2009-04-28T20:20:00.000-07:00

I am truly trying to find my 'quiet'. It's been almost 1 year since my break-up with my ex-boyfriend of 10 years, and I still have not been blessed with any other relationships. I have had fun, and gone on several dates, but nothing has ever come of any of it. And while I am a very independent person, it is difficult for me to be a solitary person. So while I look for my next love, I try to find my tranquility within and work on loving myself more. I realize it's something I need to do for my own health... physically, mentally, and emotionally. And maybe that's why this span of time has not come to an end yet. Maybe I am meant to continue my self-work for a while longer. I try to convince myself that all things happen in their destined time. But that doesn't override my innate impatience. LOL

All I really want is someone who wants to take care of me & my needs the same way that I desire to take care of them & their needs. I want to be a fulfilling force in someone's life... and have the same for myself. That sounds a little greedy when I put it into words. Surely though, after all I have endured the past 11 years, I am deserving of some fulfillment.

I'm not looking for pity or encouragement, I swear. I just needed to vent a little, and release these feelings so they would stop consuming me. One day at a time, and soon enough, I'll be able to look back and laugh at my silly melancholy.

work

2009-04-27T20:59:00.000-07:00

Worked from 7:15am until 7:41pm today. STILL did not get finished. Have SO much more to do. This new systems implementation is difficult to be patient with. But so many people at work are approaching the change with so much negativity that I try extra-extra hard to remain positive. For a cynic like me, it's been hard. But I am sure that we can get thru this if everyone will just stop focusing on their complaints and start looking toward better methods and procedures that will make our jobs easier.

Now how do I say that to THEM without sounding like a total asshole? Sigh.

Nephew's birthday

2009-04-26T19:29:00.000-07:00

My nephew, Riley, turned 5 on Wednesday. He is a typical 5-year-old boy and loves all things super-hero. So I sent him a Spiderman birthday card that had Spiderman stickers on the inside. I told my brother to take a pic of his face when he opened the card. Sooo cute! Aunt Penny scores! LOL

there always has to be a first

2009-04-26T19:04:00.000-07:00

So I'm just here to rant, rave, vent, and share, basically. I want to journal the significant things that happen to me each day: Random pictures that I took, or a conversation I had with my niece.

Nothing big or crazy... just a snapshot of what stood out to me that day.